Dear John

Best book i've read so far. I cried so much, it was really good. I am now bookless =/

It got me thinking though. I don't know what to do anymore. Maybe everyones right. Maybe I don't want it anymore. I've waited so long, & now that I have it; I don't want it. I don't know what to do about it though. For some reason, I want you to do something about it. & you not doing anything make me feel unimportant, but what more can I ask for? I understand I guess. No, actually; I don't. Why don't you do something about it !? It frustrates me so much ! You see me drifting away. See me pushing myself away, & you act like you don't care ! I don't know what to do ! I wanna cry.

I think I am going to cry, & expect a text im never going to receive, & I if I do, a text I won't answer.

I need to do something about this. I need something. I need to know what it feels like to breathe again. <3


Kpce

Lucha por amor. <3

I wanna blogg bit idontknow about what. Lol

I didnt go to school. & it was Vannas birthday. She looked so pretty. <3

I did my eyeliner so pretty & I've been home allday lol

Idk what to do. I'm bored. I shouldve went to dance.

Im going to rosemarys tomorrow. She's making me breakfast. :D I <3 her.


Yeah. Ima go "study".


Kpce

Boats & Hoes !

Watching stepbrothers with gabe, natasha, giggles, & chris. :) <3

Dear nobody,
I don't know where to begin. I'm usually so happy, but this is starting to get on my nerves.
I don't know what to do anymore.
I need you, but I don't want you.
I want you, but I can't do this.
This is too hard for me
It makes no sense.
It makes all the sense in the world.
I don't know what to do with myself.

Today was so blah. I'm just really funny xD.
I make guava & rosemary laugh so much! I'm funny xD
I always make my own day, but then it goes away

I'm always happy around other people, but when it comes to me time; nothing makes sense.
Fml; this is gay & tomorrows uniform day ugh !

Step brothers is really funny. I've seen this movie like four times in the past month. Hilarious.


I love Rosemary <3



I'm frustrated, so I'm just gonna go.

Kpceee

The way you do the things you do; make me fall in love with you. <3

Yesterday was hilarious ! Mad fun yesterday. (:

"practice" was fun. They mad dumbbb. Lmao

Blahhh idk what to write. I gotta get ready. Lalalaaaa.

It's not the same anymore. Idk what's wrong. But whatever. I'm in a good mood today. I'm not gonna ruin it.

I'm gonna showerrr. Pceeee. (:

You probaby don't care what I have to say. <3

Today was horrible ! This week has been horrible ! -_____-

Monday, back to school. Yaaay. Nothing really happened. So blah.

Tuesday morning, I find out something I didn't want to find out. Honestly, I'm not over it. It's not that I don't want you to talk to her. Well, it kind of is; but I will never tell you to do that. I just know how she can be, & knowing she doesn't like me, who knows what's she's saying about me. I don't know. I just wanna know what went on, or what didn't go on. I just don't want to bring it up again because it gets me mad. I don't know. I don't want to ruin anything with you, ever. You're apart of me now, whether you like it or not & like I don't know. I'm just scared, terrified even. I want to give it my all, but how can I give my all to someones who has let me down before; more than once. & it's hard not knowing if your giving it your all. I'm horrible at commitment, but I know with you is where I want to stay. <3

Today, no school. So I decided to have practice. Everything went completely wrong. Period. Bad day over all. But then people started leaving and watched a movie with gabe&natasha. It was fun. (: now I'm just watching the real world. I wanna have fun like these people. I just want to see baby. =/

Ugh! I just want to be next to him. It sounds super beat & stupid, but I hate not being able to see him whenever I want, & I hate not being able to I don't know just being able to BE with you.

I wanna run.
I want to stay.
I want to cry.
I want to smile.
I don't want to be scared.
but, I can't help it.

love can sometimes be m a g i c, but magic can sometimes be just an i l l u s i o n <3

I'm off to bed.

Kpce.

It's been a while.

I feel like I can't keep up with this thing anymore.

Let's see; December 22 was a Tuesday. Well, the rest of the week was iiighttt. lol

Then Christmasssssssss ♥

I was a third wheel on Christmas Eve. With my LITTLE cousin. -____- So, I was like "eff that, I'm leaving" I went outside and was with baby♥ for a little. I missed him, a lot. <3

Then, blah after Christmas I don't remember much of. All I know is that in between that I stayed over Jay's and saw baby again. (: New Years was kind of wack ; who drinks sparkling apple cider ?! HEEHEEHEExD it was iiight though. Spent it with Jay & Vanna: my favorite girls (:

Next morning went out with Gabe Vanna Jay & Deuce. Mean ass adventure. Mall, bowling, park, movie night. Saw baby again <3 he makes me happy (: That day was an adventure.

Saturday stayed home alllll day; dique "homework day" I didn't even start. I stayed over the little boogers house (nextdoor) and slept with Keyla. That little girl is the cutest, & Kimberly looks up to me so much. ilovethosegirls♥

Today; did nothing until confirmation, it was mad weird, I thought you would be there. Since you weren't, saved me from a lot. (: Although, I had a lot to say to you, but I guess that's fine. (:


Overall, I'm happy. (:

I don't really want to go back to school though, but it is what it is.

Doing homework for now, I guess..

kpce ♥